


Over Fire and Water

by chocolatebirdie



Category: Glee
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-01-14
Updated: 2015-01-14
Packaged: 2018-03-07 12:42:55
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,690
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3174050
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/chocolatebirdie/pseuds/chocolatebirdie
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>"Sebastian wouldn't tell Kurt he and Blaine were soulmates, wouldn't tell Kurt to just apologize and fix things. Sebastian didn't care. He would let him just... be."</p>
<p>After Kurt found out that Blaine was dating David Karofsky, he decided he needed a change in his life: a new friend, Sebastian Smythe.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Over Fire and Water

**Author's Note:**

> so this is basically a 6x01/6x02 reaction/fix-it fic because why not?
> 
> thanks to ally sebklaine for comments, editing, ideas, etc. :)
> 
> warning for a mention of suicide attempt (in relation to karofsky in season 3) 
> 
> also title from "through the dark" by one direction because what fic title isn't actually song lyrics?? but really listen to this song because it fits really well with this fic.

Kurt sat up in his bed and wiped his eyes for the fourth time that week and decided that enough was enough. He was tired of crying over Blaine - Blaine who had moved on, to David Karofsky of all people. He didn't want to cry anymore. He didn't want to hurt. He just wanted to forget it all. 

He pulled his phone out of his pocket and scrolled through his contacts, trying to find someone to hang out with for the night. He didn't feel up to a night with Rachel - that would inevitably be another night of talking about Blaine - nor did he want to spend the whole night with Santana and her endless stream of innuendos and often harsh comments about his love life. 

And then he saw Sebastian's name.

Sebastian Smythe. He hadn't even remembered that he had Sebastian's number. Blaine had given it to him the night the three of them had gone to Scandals together, but Kurt had never used it or even thought of it again. He clicked on the name to delete the contact - but on a whim he decided to open a message to him instead.

Sebastian wouldn't tell Kurt he and Blaine were soulmates, wouldn't tell Kurt to just apologize and fix things. Sebastian didn't care. He would let him just... be.

 

To Sebastian: Do you want to go do something?

 

It occurred to Kurt that he had no idea whether or not Sebastian had his number, and well, wouldn't that be embarrassing.

But then his phone pinged, three times in a row, and it was clear Sebastian knew just who he was talking to. 

 

To Kurt: ....

To Kurt: Never thought this day would come.

To Kurt: Would you like to get coffee? 

To Sebastian: Actually, I was thinking… Scandals.

To Kurt: Wait. You’re in Lima? 

 

Oh. Of course Sebastian didn’t know – why would he? They weren't friends.

 

To Sebastian: I am. Where are you?

To Kurt: NYU.

To Sebastian: Oh.

To Sebastian: Right.

To Kurt: What are you doing in Lima?

To Sebastian: Long story.

To Kurt: …

To Kurt: Okay then. 

To Sebastian: I’m sorry for bothering you.

To Kurt: I’ll be home for fall break in a few days. If you want to go then.

 

They worked out the details the next day, Thursday. Sebastian was going to pick Kurt up at 10 on Saturday, and then they would head out to Scandals together.

~~~

Kurt debated canceling his plans with Sebastian no less than six times between Thursday and Saturday. What was he even thinking? He and Sebastian weren’t even friends!

_But isn’t that the point?_ He thought. Sebastian didn’t care about him, not really – not enough to judge him, at any rate; and Kurt didn’t care what Sebastian thought of him. And right then that was just what Kurt needed.

~~~

 

To Kurt: I'm here

 

Kurt said goodbye to his dad, deciding it best not to tell him who he was spending his night with, before walking out the door and into Sebastian’s car in his driveway.

“Hi,” Kurt said a little awkwardly as he climbed in.

“Hey.” 

The air grew awkward around their silence as Sebastian backed out of Kurt’s driveway and headed towards Scandals. Kurt knew he should be the one to say something – this was his idea after all, and considering he and Sebastian weren’t even friends, an explanation was probably deserved. But an explanation would mean bringing up Blaine again, which would defeat the whole purpose of the evening. Maybe he would catch a break, and Sebastian would be too disinterested to ask.

“So,” Sebastian said after five painfully long minutes of silence, “you gonna tell me what this is all about?”

…Or not.

“Do I have to?” Kurt grumbled.

“Kurt, you and I have purposely hung out alone a grand total of zero times. The only conversation we’ve even had in private before this one is when I was calling you ‘gay face’ and you said I had CW hair and the face of a meerkat. I haven’t seen you since the engagement, and haven’t actually talked to you since…well. Since Dave.” Sebastian’s voice grew somber by the end, and Kurt wondered just how much guilt Sebastian still felt after all this time.

“Well,” Kurt said after a moment. “I guess I just needed a change of pace.”

“Meaning?”

“Meaning, things… happened recently that I know my friends are perceiving a certain way and I don’t want to hear what they have to say about it.”

“That was vague as shit, Hummel, and you know it,” Sebastian said, glancing at Kurt for a second with a smirk on his lips. Kurt couldn’t help but smirk a little, too. Sebastian never did put up with his bullshit. 

“You’re gonna have to get me drunk for me to spill,” was all Kurt said.

~~~

Kurt was not at all in the mood for dancing this time around. He ordered a Long Island iced tea and drank it too quickly while Sebastian watched him, laughing when Kurt was finished in just a few minutes.

“Quit laughing at me,” Kurt mumbled at his empty glass.

“Sorry,” Sebastian said, laughing still.

“Everyone’s always judging me all the time,” Kurt said, barely loud enough to be heard over the blaring music.

“Kurt, look, I didn’t mean – ”

“ ‘Why did you break up with Blaine, Kurt? That’s the dumbest thing you’ve ever done!’” Kurt interjects. “ ‘Blaine is your soulmate, just apologize for being an idiot, Kurt.’ ‘If you’re so in love with him why did you even break up with him, Kurt?’ Stupid Kurt, silly, scared Kurt, that’s all I ever hear. From my friends, from myself. Even my dad doesn’t really understand me.”

Kurt doesn’t register the surprised look on Sebastian’s face – clearly Kurt hadn’t been kidding when he said he just needed to be drunk to open up.

“Kurt,” Sebastian said softly. “You know you don’t owe anyone an explanation, right? You can make your own choices for whatever reasons you have. They’re _your_ choices.”

“What if I don’t have a reason?”

“You do.”

“What do you mean I do, I’m saying I don’t think I do! I love him. I do. I’ve always loved him. Why would I break up with him if I love him?” Kurt was close to tears, again. This was definitely not how he’d wanted this night to go. But Sebastian actually might have been the best listener he’s faced since he broke up with Blaine.

“Sure you love him, Kurt, after everything you two have been through. But does that feel like enough to you?”

“What?” Kurt wasn’t sure if it was the alcohol or his own stubbornness that was keeping him from comprehending what Sebastian was trying to say.

“Of course you love him, Kurt. But do you want to be with him?”

Kurt looked up at Sebastian then, at the serious gaze in his eyes that he was still getting used to. No one had ever asked him that question – not like that.

And, well. Kurt didn’t have an answer to that.

Not one he was willing to admit, at least.

~~~

To Sebastian: Thanks. For last night.

To Kurt: Any time. You know I got more to offer. You just have to ask ;) 

 

Kurt scoffs. Nothing – absolutely nothing – remotely sexual had transpired between the two of them, but of course Sebastian would take it there. 

 

To Sebastian: Screw you, you know what I meant.

To Kurt: I do.

To Kurt: And I meant it. Any time.

To Kurt: I know we were never friends and I know that was pretty much all my fault, but I would like to try now, if you want. I had fun last night. 

To Sebastian: I want to, too.

To Sebastian: I’m not doing anything today. Lima Bean? 3?

 

Coffee at the Lima Bean at three turned into a five o’clock movie, which turned into a 7:30 dinner, which turned into going to Kurt’s house at nine and watching the sixth Harry Potter movie on ABC Family.

Sunday turned into Monday, and Tuesday, and Thursday (Wednesday Sebastian spent the day with his family), and Friday family night dinner at Kurt’s house – much to his dad’s poorly concealed shock – and Sunday at the Smythes, where Sebastian packed his suitcase to go back to New York and Kurt tried not to gawk too much at his gigantic, absolutely beautiful house.

As it turned out, Sebastian and Kurt got along extremely well when they weren’t at each other’s throats. Sebastian made him laugh, and actually forget about his messy past with Blaine for once. He laughed when Kurt teased him and always had a comeback at hand, always lighthearted, never malicious. Kurt actually felt _happy_ again. 

Sebastian told stories of his grandmother and France, and Kurt told stories of his mother and growing up without her. He told Kurt that his grandmother would love him, and maybe he could meet her one day, and Kurt swore his heart melt.

Kurt hugged Sebastian goodbye on Sunday at four before Sebastian left to go to the airport. He wanted to go to the airport with him, but he couldn’t bring himself to ask.

They texted almost non-stop for the next few months, and Kurt knew his friends were giving him strange looks, and he heard their unasked questions, but he refused to answer. It was none of their business, anyway.

“I know something’s going on with you, and I’m pretty sure it involves someone that’s not Blaine,” Rachel said one day when they’re having lunch together.

Kurt sighed heavily. “I’m not talking to you about this, Rachel.”

“I’m not asking you to tell me who it is or what’s going on,” Rachel said. “I just, I wanted to say I’m happy for you, that you’re happy again. And I’m sorry.”  
  
“Sorry?”

“For making you feel like you couldn’t talk to me about this. I know I pushed pretty hard for you to get back with Blaine, but, you have to believe me Kurt, I only did it because I thought it was what you couldn’t admit you wanted.” Rachel’s eyes pleaded with him, and Kurt knew she was being honest. “You’re my best friend, Kurt. All I want is for you to be happy.”

~~~

Kurt and Sebastian spent much of Sebastian’s winter break together, whenever they didn’t have family commitments. For Christmas, Kurt gave Sebastian a special edition copy of his favorite book, [Le Petit Prince](http://blogs.scientificamerican.com/literally-psyched/files/2012/03/Le-Petit-Prince.jpg), and Sebastian gave Kurt a beautiful, copper-colored [bracelet](http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-QwF6e51IkcU/T3zwmz6nP6I/AAAAAAAAHi8/39Ab3JG8ZRM/s1600/CartierLoveBracelet.png).

“It’s from France,” Sebastian explained. “I asked my grandmother to place the order. She was very intrigued about this boy I was buying jewelry for.”

Kurt grinned. “Well she’ll just have to meet me for herself, won’t she? I love it, by the way. Thank you.”

Sebastian murmured “You’re welcome” and Kurt didn’t know why he felt like he was supposed to finish that moment with a kiss, but he didn’t.

~~~

“Are you doing anything for New Years?” Sebastian asked a few days later, over the phone. It was one of the few days they spent apart, because Sebastian’s mother insisted he spend time with his family besides just from Christmas day.

“I don’t know,” Kurt replied, “are you about to invite me to something?”

“You do know me so well. As a matter of fact, the Smythes’ like to have a bunch of snobs over for New Year’s and it’s usually unbearable, so I thought you could make it, you know, not. If you want. If you’re not doing anything, I mean, of course you’re welcome to spend time with your own family but you know. If you want to come over you... can.”

Kurt smiled at Sebastian’s ineloquence. “I’d love to.”

~~~

Sebastian was not kidding when he said there would be snobs at this party. By ten o’clock, Sebastian and Kurt had ditched the main party in the living room to go up to Sebastian’s room and watch Dick Clark’s New Year’s Rockin’ Eve, with the TV at an obnoxiously high volume so as to irritate the guests below. They sang along all night and, after darting downstairs to grab two glasses of champagne, screamed along with the countdown to midnight.

After Kurt and Sebastian both downed their drinks, Sebastian leaned in and kissed Kurt full on the lips, his hands coming up to snake around Kurt’s waist.

Kurt couldn’t help but kiss back, and when he finally broke the kiss, breathless and surely with cheeks flushed red, he couldn’t help but wonder what the hell that had been. When he met Sebastian’s eyes, Sebastian just smiled, laughing a little, and pulled away from Kurt. After an awkward pause, Sebastian scratched the back of neck, looking steadfastly at the ground now – _was he embarrassed?_

“Uh, do you wanna – should we go downstairs now? Everyone will start leaving soon anyways…”

“Sure,” Kurt murmured, and he followed Sebastian out of his room.

Sebastian never said anything about the kiss, and after a while Kurt wrote it off as just a friendly kiss at midnight. He stayed at the Smythes’ until a little after one, at which point Sebastian walked him out to his car.

Kurt was just opening his car door when Sebastian caught his wrist. When Kurt turned around, he could see Sebastian leaning in towards him, and he closed his eyes.

Kissing Sebastian felt terrifying and incredible at the same time. Sebastian’s lips were warm on his and his body was flush against his own, and Kurt wondered if Sebastian knew his stomach was doing somersaults. 

Kissing Sebastian lit Kurt up, it made him feel lighter, like this was where he was meant to be. He didn’t remember the last time kissing Blaine had felt like this, if it ever had. And – shit.

Blaine.

Kurt pulled away from the kiss, breathless, and took a step back towards his car. “I – I’m sorry,” he whispered, looking up at Sebastian.

Kurt could see Sebastian was trying hard to hide the disappointment in his eyes, and for that Kurt was grateful. “It’s okay,” Sebastian said.

“It’s just – ”

“I promise, Kurt, it’s okay. You don’t owe me anything.” Kurt knew that Sebastian meant it; could tell by the sincerity in his voice, the warmth in his eyes. Which was exactly why he wanted to tell him.

“I know I don’t. But I just – I want you to know.” Kurt took a deep breath. “Blaine and I, we were – we were together for a long time. You know that, I know, but – he was also the only person I’ve ever really dated. The one other time I tried, well – it didn’t work, and I wasn’t fair to that guy at all. I don’t know how not to be with Blaine, and I want to figure that out before I start anything else. Anything with you.”

Kurt steps towards Sebastian and hugs him tightly, trying to put all of his feelings into this one gesture.

“I can’t,” Kurt murmured into Sebastian’s chest. “But I’m not saying not ever. Just – not yet.”

“Okay,” Sebastian whispered.

~~~

Just two weeks after New Year’s, Kurt returned to New York to start his spring semester at NYADA. His schedule was busy, but he and Sebastian never failed to see each other at least once a week.

They spent Valentine’s Day together, eating take out and watching movies on Kurt’s loveseat, and there were no pretenses, no assumptions about what this meant. It was just Kurt and Sebastian, together, like always. Kurt knew that meant something.

He thought it might mean everything.

~~~

It is a bright, sunny day in March when Kurt knocks on Sebastian’s apartment door with butterflies in his stomach.

When Sebastian answers the door, Kurt doesn’t know what to say, so he doesn’t.

This time, Kurt leans in and kisses Sebastian, wrapping his arms around Sebastian’s middle. He feels Sebastian’s surprise, but it takes no longer than a second for Sebastian to kiss him back earnestly. This time, Sebastian is the one who pulls back, for no reason other than a need for oxygen – and maybe an explanation.

Kurt just says, “I can.”

**Author's Note:**

> thank you so so so much to soseinin for [this beautiful art](http://soseinen.tumblr.com/post/118033712189/over-fire-and-water-one-shot-by-chocolatebirdie) for my fic!!!


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